nothing and everything's been going on...
the world was spinning faster and faster,
it was passing by in a blur.
she just sat there, staring in wonder
at how many people would pass by,
heads down, muttering to themselves.
she always tried to smile at them,
receiving bemused expressions and hesitant half-smiles back.
seconds, minutes, hours, days...
life just seemed to speed on by.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
:)
Dear You,
I will admit that it came as a surprise to me when you decided to write a letter such as this. I always thought you were the type to keep things to yourself—one of the many things that keep us apart until now.
There is a part of every boy’s heart that dreams of his princess. However, no matter what the age, this princess does not change.
Nineteen years into this life, and although your unwillingness to give your heart away is what troubles you, what troubles me is how willing I am each and every time to give my complete heart and yet there is no one to receive anything of me.
Try as I might to give my heart to someone I had imagined was perfect, and I end up putting the pieces back together, mustering the courage to make it seems like nothing is wrong and nothing has been lost, when in fact, everything in my life at that point feels otherwise.
Although I have only known you for a few years, I am as confident as a man in love can be, that you are the perfect girl I have been thinking of ever since. Nineteen years into this life, and we are both still apparently waiting… for someone to be swept off her feet, and for someone to sweep you off yours. And yet, here we are closer to each other than you would expect.
I am sorry I took this long. But, I hope you know, it has not been entirely easy, trying to whisk you off to my palace on horseback. I am not alone in this pursuit of your love and I have no palace to show you in comparison to the many other men who will try to win your heart. You have not been entirely cooperative as well, but I do not blame you for this. In fact, it’s just one of the many quirks that sets you apart from other girls out there.
You will be disappointed to know that it has not been such a fairytale - meeting me, and for this I will be eternally sorry. I hope you know guys spend more than enough time trying to come up with the perfect introduction, what with sweaty palms and a shaky voice. As to the extreme disappointment I may cause you, I also hope you know that you are still as perfect in my eyes as always. I may not have begun it as a fairytale for us, but I will go through leaps and bounds to make you feel like the princess that you are.
Your eccentricities are what I love about you. Even during your occasional mood swings, it is the most endearing thing to see you shift gears. Although I must admit, sometimes it can be quite confusing; keeping me on my toes, it just makes me want to be with you even more. I want to be the man you stand beside at your best and your worst—because either way, you are still too beautiful, and I would be nothing less than the luckiest guy in town if you were just as happy as I was, standing beside you.
You are and will always be my best friend, even if one day I end up finding no more shirts because you have borrowed them all. And when you return them I end up not wearing them, still, because the scent is there to remind me of you even when you are not around. You are my best friend because you look out for me, after a stressful day, or after we lose a game of basketball. Even during times when you refuse to speak to anyone, me included—you are still my best friend.
You will be the girl I try so hard to cook for, and despite my best efforts I know I will fail, but I will love how you will try to taste my concoctions, even when the taste might make you cringe. You will be the girl whose mom I will try so hard to impress, and then you will fix my collar in hopes that I am ready to meet your parents. Adventure after adventure, you will be the girl I will see the world with, complete with the local cuisine taste and souvenir shots.
You are the girl I will smile to even in the worst of times. Even when the day feels like s__t, I know that when I see you that my world cannot be so bad if you are beside me. You are the girl whose smile I will wake up to, even when some mornings might find me with a slight case of morning breath. I cannot wait to love you.
Fingers crossed and palms held together, I hope one day you will find me worthy of your heart. In the meantime, know that I am out here somewhere, waiting for you, hoping that you will be mine.
Loving you forever and a day,
Me
I will admit that it came as a surprise to me when you decided to write a letter such as this. I always thought you were the type to keep things to yourself—one of the many things that keep us apart until now.
There is a part of every boy’s heart that dreams of his princess. However, no matter what the age, this princess does not change.
Nineteen years into this life, and although your unwillingness to give your heart away is what troubles you, what troubles me is how willing I am each and every time to give my complete heart and yet there is no one to receive anything of me.
Try as I might to give my heart to someone I had imagined was perfect, and I end up putting the pieces back together, mustering the courage to make it seems like nothing is wrong and nothing has been lost, when in fact, everything in my life at that point feels otherwise.
Although I have only known you for a few years, I am as confident as a man in love can be, that you are the perfect girl I have been thinking of ever since. Nineteen years into this life, and we are both still apparently waiting… for someone to be swept off her feet, and for someone to sweep you off yours. And yet, here we are closer to each other than you would expect.
I am sorry I took this long. But, I hope you know, it has not been entirely easy, trying to whisk you off to my palace on horseback. I am not alone in this pursuit of your love and I have no palace to show you in comparison to the many other men who will try to win your heart. You have not been entirely cooperative as well, but I do not blame you for this. In fact, it’s just one of the many quirks that sets you apart from other girls out there.
You will be disappointed to know that it has not been such a fairytale - meeting me, and for this I will be eternally sorry. I hope you know guys spend more than enough time trying to come up with the perfect introduction, what with sweaty palms and a shaky voice. As to the extreme disappointment I may cause you, I also hope you know that you are still as perfect in my eyes as always. I may not have begun it as a fairytale for us, but I will go through leaps and bounds to make you feel like the princess that you are.
Your eccentricities are what I love about you. Even during your occasional mood swings, it is the most endearing thing to see you shift gears. Although I must admit, sometimes it can be quite confusing; keeping me on my toes, it just makes me want to be with you even more. I want to be the man you stand beside at your best and your worst—because either way, you are still too beautiful, and I would be nothing less than the luckiest guy in town if you were just as happy as I was, standing beside you.
You are and will always be my best friend, even if one day I end up finding no more shirts because you have borrowed them all. And when you return them I end up not wearing them, still, because the scent is there to remind me of you even when you are not around. You are my best friend because you look out for me, after a stressful day, or after we lose a game of basketball. Even during times when you refuse to speak to anyone, me included—you are still my best friend.
You will be the girl I try so hard to cook for, and despite my best efforts I know I will fail, but I will love how you will try to taste my concoctions, even when the taste might make you cringe. You will be the girl whose mom I will try so hard to impress, and then you will fix my collar in hopes that I am ready to meet your parents. Adventure after adventure, you will be the girl I will see the world with, complete with the local cuisine taste and souvenir shots.
You are the girl I will smile to even in the worst of times. Even when the day feels like s__t, I know that when I see you that my world cannot be so bad if you are beside me. You are the girl whose smile I will wake up to, even when some mornings might find me with a slight case of morning breath. I cannot wait to love you.
Fingers crossed and palms held together, I hope one day you will find me worthy of your heart. In the meantime, know that I am out here somewhere, waiting for you, hoping that you will be mine.
Loving you forever and a day,
Me
Friday, June 25, 2010
okaaaaaaaay
so, i haven't written in a LONG time and i should really do this as a journal of sorts..
so it's summer right now and i'm working my butt off to lose weight...
and i'm eating healthier than normal :)
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..
She laughed. The heat was intoxicating... warm... beautiful even, after spending days upon days on end in the cold winter heat. It warmed her to the core, heightened her senses, and made her ecstatic. She closed her eyes, and bathed in the peace, the calm of the day.
so it's summer right now and i'm working my butt off to lose weight...
and i'm eating healthier than normal :)
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..
She laughed. The heat was intoxicating... warm... beautiful even, after spending days upon days on end in the cold winter heat. It warmed her to the core, heightened her senses, and made her ecstatic. She closed her eyes, and bathed in the peace, the calm of the day.
Friday, March 12, 2010
who am i?
it just makes me think. i can't describe who i am in words, because i'm a torrent of unpredictable emotions and i always change my mind... but what are my goals, aspirations, hopes, dreams? what are my loves and hates? who am i?
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
fire
raged through her throat, as she felt that she couldn't breathe. unknown things attacked her body, leaving only a shell of what Synthia Smith was before. coughing, sputtering, and feeling like everything was going to end, she began to pray.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
the sights
the sights amazed her. she didn't know that going back was going to be this life changing, this epic. green and blue were all she really saw. occasional houses, now and again, but the foliage and the history rang clear and true. the warmth enveloped her with something she hadn't felt for a long time: happiness. true bliss spread through her body and radiated into her soul, washing away her fears and pains, the negative energies, and the bad thoughts in her mind. she was home.
diary entry:
i had the chance to be innocent once again, to be myself. to go without the sarcastic remarks and to open my eyes to the things surrounding me. i got to see people as they truly were, and i didn't like what i saw for the most part. now i yearn, ache, and cry to go back home.
diary entry:
i had the chance to be innocent once again, to be myself. to go without the sarcastic remarks and to open my eyes to the things surrounding me. i got to see people as they truly were, and i didn't like what i saw for the most part. now i yearn, ache, and cry to go back home.
Friday, December 11, 2009
f'shooooooooo
a squeal in the audience snapped her back into attention. "move! get out there!" hissed the people behind her, "you're holding everyone back!"
nervously, she walked down the aisle, hoping that during her performance she wouldn't mess up. watching the director intently, she focused and went into her own world.
claps and cheers burst from the audience. they liked it! she smiled and looked at the person beside her, grinning from ear to ear.
nervously, she walked down the aisle, hoping that during her performance she wouldn't mess up. watching the director intently, she focused and went into her own world.
claps and cheers burst from the audience. they liked it! she smiled and looked at the person beside her, grinning from ear to ear.
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